OK, an anonymous person who may or may not be googling herself, let me know in no uncertain terms that the government of our great land of milk and honey, our bastion of freedom in a swirling abyss of anarchy, may not take kindly to some strange fat man expressing interest in any government scientists, especially while using the word ‘stalk’, even in jest.

So for the record… I, nor any of my many fictional personas, have ever actively stalked or participated in any stalking, real or imaginary. Furthermore, I promise to discurage anyone from showing any interest in scientists or Science in general. I will actively encourage everyone to run to church, renounce all reason and good sense, get baptized, and grab your “God Hates Fags” sign while protesting at soldiers’ funerals. This I would do to make sure that everyone knows I have no interest in stalking government scientists.

However if you aren’t convinced,¬†and you wish to interogate my friends with any waterboarding techniques or any other Executive approved torture methods, they would all concur that I am the least likely person in America to be fixated any longer than it takes to look up someone on Google. However, I whole-heartedly encourage you to try, I will be more than happy to supply you with a list of people who I consider my bestest friends and deserve some serious water-boarding.